Post by RunningAway on Jan 21, 2008 15:14:50 GMT -5
In case anyone missed this from Minka's Advent Calendar or would just like to read it again.
Lifehouse in: A Charlie Brown-Like Christmas
Jason Wade walked around in the fake California snow that covered his backyard. He was scheduled to do yet another performance for yet another publicity Christmas event. Sure, they were fun with all their happy-go-lucky people and overpaid fake fat guy in a red jumpsuit, but he was starting to believe that there was something more to Christmas than watching Rick and Bryce get drunk off eggnog and chase the reindeer around the studio. Jason couldn’t put his finger on it, but there was something that had been bugging him over the years. As he was pondering a very well thought out monologue, the voices of children flooded the story.
Christmas time is here,
Happiness and cheer.
Fun for all,
That children call,
Their favorite time of year.
Jason: I gotta build a bigger fence.
Jason continued to stand alone until he felt a presence come up beside him. It was his good friend and drummer, Rick, dressed for the frigid 57-degree weather. He held a small blue blanket over his shoulders and was fighting the urge to suck his thumb.
Rick: You ready to go?
Jason: Since when do you carry around a small blue blanket?
Rick: Um…since always. This just shows how little you actually notice about me.
Jason: That’s not true.
Rick: What color is my stubble?
Jason: Um…is this a trick question?
Rick: Never mind. Let’s get going to this overly commercialized Christmas event before I freeze in this frigid 57-degree weather.
Rick started to walk to the front yard when suddenly he noticed that Jason wasn’t following him.
Rick: Jason, what’s wrong? You seem a little down today.
Jason: I don’t know. I think there’s something wrong with me. Christmas is almost here and I can’t get into the right spirit of things. I enjoy doing holiday covers, and even putting tinsel on Bryce and making him our band tree…but I still can’t help but feeling depressed by everything at the same time.
Rick: You know what, Jay, you’re the only person I know, besides the drunk Easter Bunny outside the 7-11, that can make me feel bad about Christmas. You’re really bringing me down and I can’t stand it.
Jason: I’m sorry, Rick. I’ve just been thinking lately that all this commercialism is going to backfire someday. Shouldn’t we find out what Christmas is all about?
Rick: See, this is where “thinking” gets you. I’m not leaving you alone in the back of the tour bus anymore.
The two men continued on to the overly commercialized Christmas event where Ben and Bryce were being merry and dancing around to the fun piano song from quite a popular Charles Shultz Christmas cartoon.
Rick: Hey, guys! We’re here now. We have to act professional.
Bryce: Who says?
Rick: Jason.
Ben: Oh…
The piano music started back up and the two men returned to their dance of merriment.
Jason: If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you guys don’t have any respect for me.
Rick: Oh don’t be so melodramatic, Jason, of course we have respect for you. We just enjoy going against what you want, is all.
Jason: These guys just don’t know how to take direction. I don’t know…I don’t even want to be here. I’d be perfectly content staying in bed watching Pee Wee’s Playhouse in German.
Rick: That is a fun time.
After his dance of merriment, Bryce walked over the guys.
Bryce: Jason, why you so down in the mouth?
Rick: He’s trying to figure out the true meaning of Christmas.
Bryce: Oh, God. Jason, not again…
Jason: Hey, first of all I’ve only ever contemplated the meaning of my own life, and secondly, it wouldn’t hurt any of us to stop and think about it. I mean it becomes faker every year.
Bryce: That’s it. We’re not leaving you alone in the back of the tour bus anymore.
Rick: Word.
Bryce: Look, Wade, if you want us to get serious, we’re gonna need a tour bus that actually allows us transport a miniature bathing pool.
Rick: We don’t nee a miniature ba—
Bryce: Shut it.
Jason: Hmmm…well I guess that could be good for therapeutic purposes.
Bryce: Exactly. “Therapeutic purposes.” I mean it’s almost in the low 50s outside. We’ll need something to keep us warm and our skin baby fresh.
Jason: All right. I’ll go scout out a new tour bus. But you guys will practice while I’m gone, right?
Bryce: Of course we will. Would I lie to you?
Rick: Yes.
Bryce: Rick, do I need to wrap your mouth in ribbons again?
Rick: Oh, tis the season. *smiles*
And so, Jason and Rick traveled far and wide—or maybe just a couple blocks south, to find the perfect Christmas tour bus with a built-in bathing pool—for therapeutic purposes. They came upon a yard full of all kinds of cars, vans, buses, carriages, bikes, scooters…you get the idea. The two scoured around passing fancy tour buses, one covered in gold that Rick insisted they check out. Jason kept walking a little longer until he found an old rusted RV with a bumper sticker that read, “We don’t break for nuns,” on the back.
Jason: I think I like this one.
Rick: Are you crazy?
Jason: I know its nothing showy, but I think it’s got a lot of character.
Rick: I don’t think it’ll make it out of the parking lot.
A salesman nearby saw the two gentlemen discussing and went up with a huge white grin on his face.
Salesman: Merry Christmas good people in search of transportation. Is there anyway I can make your voyage into the buying unknown less stressful?
Jason: Um…no. I think we’re gonna take this one. *he points to the old RV*
Salesman: *confused* You’re serious?
Jason: I suppose we look like the type who would want a big fancy bus with a built in bar?
Rick: Actually—
Jason: Shut it.
Rick: I’m getting no respect today.
Salesman: So, you’ll take it?
Rick: Wait, what about the bathing pool we promised Bryce?
Jason: Oh yeah…
Salesman: Actually, there is a woman name Edna who lives in there and will hose you down for no extra charge. *smiles*
Rick: Oh we are so in now!
Jason and Rick traveled back up to the studio where they were just about ready to perform for the highly commercialized event. Jason told Ben and Bryce to come out and see their new wheels. Bryce and Ben came out to see the huge rusted RV with Rick in the drivers seat waving, with a big woman with no teeth next to him.
Ben: What the—
Bryce: Hell?
Jason: What do you guys think? I mean, I know she’s not much to look at, but we could give her a nice fix up and she’ll be as good as new. Some serious male-bonding duties here.
Ben: Are you talking about the RV or the woman?
Jason: Oh, that’s Edna. She’s our “bathing pool” so to speak.
Edna: I’ll give you boys a real spit-shine, I will. *smiles with no teeth*
Bryce: Ok, that’s just wrong on possibly four levels.
Ben: Jason, I can’t believe you did this.
Bryce: Yeah really, I mean I could see Rick doing something like this, but you?
Rick: Hey!
Bryce: Let’s go back inside, Ben.
Bryce and Ben headed back into the studio while Jason and Rick slowly followed. On stage, the rest of the crew was being told what had occurred and everyone started to laugh.
Jason: I can’t believe I messed this up. Now I’m really confused. I guess I don’t know what Christmas is all about. ISN’T THERE ANYONE WHO KNOWS WHAT CHRISTMAS IS ALL ABOUT?!
Rick: Buckle up, Jay, I’m gonna rock your world with this.
Rick took center stage.
Rick: Can I get a light?
A spot light hits Rick.
Rick: Here’s the deal, Wade. You can stuff your stockings full of toys from now until you need a hip replacement…but until then, that stocking is full of love, friendship, loyalty, and devotion while it’s just plum empty. And you can’t purchase those things at Macy’s or win them in the Red Book Giveaway Extravaganza—and gee, I’m sorry if these aren’t things you can winded up and watch spin all day. Let me make this exceptionally clear, Christmas is about love. You can’t live without other people’s love—not during Christmas, not ever. So go spend that time with your friends and family, and if they laugh at you, laugh with them. And if they laugh at you again, hit ‘em and find some new friends. But for the love of God, Jesus, Mary, Joseph and his Technicolor Dream Coat don’t ever, ever forget this, Wade, you have to give love to get it. So start giving.
Rick finished and walked over to Jason.
Rick: And that’s what Christmas is all about. So now can you please, please leave this melancholy state and get back to rockin’ this overly commercialized event?
Jason: That was an amazing speech. I’m really moved. Of course I can perform at this event.
The two headed outside, ready to take the RV back, when they were surprised by cheers and clapping. The RV was all shiny and decorated in Christmas decorations.
Ben/Bryce: Merry Christmas, Jason Wade!
Jason: Guys, you didn’t have to do this.
Bryce: We know. We’re billing you.
Ben: He’s just joking.
Bryce: Or am I?
And so our Lifehouse men joined arms with each other and Edna and swayed back in forth humming Christmas tunes in the fake California snow.
Merry Christmas!
Lifehouse in: A Charlie Brown-Like Christmas
Jason Wade walked around in the fake California snow that covered his backyard. He was scheduled to do yet another performance for yet another publicity Christmas event. Sure, they were fun with all their happy-go-lucky people and overpaid fake fat guy in a red jumpsuit, but he was starting to believe that there was something more to Christmas than watching Rick and Bryce get drunk off eggnog and chase the reindeer around the studio. Jason couldn’t put his finger on it, but there was something that had been bugging him over the years. As he was pondering a very well thought out monologue, the voices of children flooded the story.
Christmas time is here,
Happiness and cheer.
Fun for all,
That children call,
Their favorite time of year.
Jason: I gotta build a bigger fence.
Jason continued to stand alone until he felt a presence come up beside him. It was his good friend and drummer, Rick, dressed for the frigid 57-degree weather. He held a small blue blanket over his shoulders and was fighting the urge to suck his thumb.
Rick: You ready to go?
Jason: Since when do you carry around a small blue blanket?
Rick: Um…since always. This just shows how little you actually notice about me.
Jason: That’s not true.
Rick: What color is my stubble?
Jason: Um…is this a trick question?
Rick: Never mind. Let’s get going to this overly commercialized Christmas event before I freeze in this frigid 57-degree weather.
Rick started to walk to the front yard when suddenly he noticed that Jason wasn’t following him.
Rick: Jason, what’s wrong? You seem a little down today.
Jason: I don’t know. I think there’s something wrong with me. Christmas is almost here and I can’t get into the right spirit of things. I enjoy doing holiday covers, and even putting tinsel on Bryce and making him our band tree…but I still can’t help but feeling depressed by everything at the same time.
Rick: You know what, Jay, you’re the only person I know, besides the drunk Easter Bunny outside the 7-11, that can make me feel bad about Christmas. You’re really bringing me down and I can’t stand it.
Jason: I’m sorry, Rick. I’ve just been thinking lately that all this commercialism is going to backfire someday. Shouldn’t we find out what Christmas is all about?
Rick: See, this is where “thinking” gets you. I’m not leaving you alone in the back of the tour bus anymore.
The two men continued on to the overly commercialized Christmas event where Ben and Bryce were being merry and dancing around to the fun piano song from quite a popular Charles Shultz Christmas cartoon.
Rick: Hey, guys! We’re here now. We have to act professional.
Bryce: Who says?
Rick: Jason.
Ben: Oh…
The piano music started back up and the two men returned to their dance of merriment.
Jason: If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you guys don’t have any respect for me.
Rick: Oh don’t be so melodramatic, Jason, of course we have respect for you. We just enjoy going against what you want, is all.
Jason: These guys just don’t know how to take direction. I don’t know…I don’t even want to be here. I’d be perfectly content staying in bed watching Pee Wee’s Playhouse in German.
Rick: That is a fun time.
After his dance of merriment, Bryce walked over the guys.
Bryce: Jason, why you so down in the mouth?
Rick: He’s trying to figure out the true meaning of Christmas.
Bryce: Oh, God. Jason, not again…
Jason: Hey, first of all I’ve only ever contemplated the meaning of my own life, and secondly, it wouldn’t hurt any of us to stop and think about it. I mean it becomes faker every year.
Bryce: That’s it. We’re not leaving you alone in the back of the tour bus anymore.
Rick: Word.
Bryce: Look, Wade, if you want us to get serious, we’re gonna need a tour bus that actually allows us transport a miniature bathing pool.
Rick: We don’t nee a miniature ba—
Bryce: Shut it.
Jason: Hmmm…well I guess that could be good for therapeutic purposes.
Bryce: Exactly. “Therapeutic purposes.” I mean it’s almost in the low 50s outside. We’ll need something to keep us warm and our skin baby fresh.
Jason: All right. I’ll go scout out a new tour bus. But you guys will practice while I’m gone, right?
Bryce: Of course we will. Would I lie to you?
Rick: Yes.
Bryce: Rick, do I need to wrap your mouth in ribbons again?
Rick: Oh, tis the season. *smiles*
And so, Jason and Rick traveled far and wide—or maybe just a couple blocks south, to find the perfect Christmas tour bus with a built-in bathing pool—for therapeutic purposes. They came upon a yard full of all kinds of cars, vans, buses, carriages, bikes, scooters…you get the idea. The two scoured around passing fancy tour buses, one covered in gold that Rick insisted they check out. Jason kept walking a little longer until he found an old rusted RV with a bumper sticker that read, “We don’t break for nuns,” on the back.
Jason: I think I like this one.
Rick: Are you crazy?
Jason: I know its nothing showy, but I think it’s got a lot of character.
Rick: I don’t think it’ll make it out of the parking lot.
A salesman nearby saw the two gentlemen discussing and went up with a huge white grin on his face.
Salesman: Merry Christmas good people in search of transportation. Is there anyway I can make your voyage into the buying unknown less stressful?
Jason: Um…no. I think we’re gonna take this one. *he points to the old RV*
Salesman: *confused* You’re serious?
Jason: I suppose we look like the type who would want a big fancy bus with a built in bar?
Rick: Actually—
Jason: Shut it.
Rick: I’m getting no respect today.
Salesman: So, you’ll take it?
Rick: Wait, what about the bathing pool we promised Bryce?
Jason: Oh yeah…
Salesman: Actually, there is a woman name Edna who lives in there and will hose you down for no extra charge. *smiles*
Rick: Oh we are so in now!
Jason and Rick traveled back up to the studio where they were just about ready to perform for the highly commercialized event. Jason told Ben and Bryce to come out and see their new wheels. Bryce and Ben came out to see the huge rusted RV with Rick in the drivers seat waving, with a big woman with no teeth next to him.
Ben: What the—
Bryce: Hell?
Jason: What do you guys think? I mean, I know she’s not much to look at, but we could give her a nice fix up and she’ll be as good as new. Some serious male-bonding duties here.
Ben: Are you talking about the RV or the woman?
Jason: Oh, that’s Edna. She’s our “bathing pool” so to speak.
Edna: I’ll give you boys a real spit-shine, I will. *smiles with no teeth*
Bryce: Ok, that’s just wrong on possibly four levels.
Ben: Jason, I can’t believe you did this.
Bryce: Yeah really, I mean I could see Rick doing something like this, but you?
Rick: Hey!
Bryce: Let’s go back inside, Ben.
Bryce and Ben headed back into the studio while Jason and Rick slowly followed. On stage, the rest of the crew was being told what had occurred and everyone started to laugh.
Jason: I can’t believe I messed this up. Now I’m really confused. I guess I don’t know what Christmas is all about. ISN’T THERE ANYONE WHO KNOWS WHAT CHRISTMAS IS ALL ABOUT?!
Rick: Buckle up, Jay, I’m gonna rock your world with this.
Rick took center stage.
Rick: Can I get a light?
A spot light hits Rick.
Rick: Here’s the deal, Wade. You can stuff your stockings full of toys from now until you need a hip replacement…but until then, that stocking is full of love, friendship, loyalty, and devotion while it’s just plum empty. And you can’t purchase those things at Macy’s or win them in the Red Book Giveaway Extravaganza—and gee, I’m sorry if these aren’t things you can winded up and watch spin all day. Let me make this exceptionally clear, Christmas is about love. You can’t live without other people’s love—not during Christmas, not ever. So go spend that time with your friends and family, and if they laugh at you, laugh with them. And if they laugh at you again, hit ‘em and find some new friends. But for the love of God, Jesus, Mary, Joseph and his Technicolor Dream Coat don’t ever, ever forget this, Wade, you have to give love to get it. So start giving.
Rick finished and walked over to Jason.
Rick: And that’s what Christmas is all about. So now can you please, please leave this melancholy state and get back to rockin’ this overly commercialized event?
Jason: That was an amazing speech. I’m really moved. Of course I can perform at this event.
The two headed outside, ready to take the RV back, when they were surprised by cheers and clapping. The RV was all shiny and decorated in Christmas decorations.
Ben/Bryce: Merry Christmas, Jason Wade!
Jason: Guys, you didn’t have to do this.
Bryce: We know. We’re billing you.
Ben: He’s just joking.
Bryce: Or am I?
And so our Lifehouse men joined arms with each other and Edna and swayed back in forth humming Christmas tunes in the fake California snow.
Merry Christmas!