Post by gogonutz on Oct 17, 2007 18:07:09 GMT -5
I'm no Maureen, but I thought I'd give it a try
It's a rainy sunday morning and Jason just got out of the shower and is looking on his schedule to see what he has to do today.
Jason: Hmm, apparently today I have nothing to do. That's mighty boring, you know? I should go to Ricky today.
He grabs his coat on the way out and calls Bryce
Jason: Yo B! wanna go hang at Rick's?
Bryce: Yeah, we should go see drummer boy, when I was talking to him online last night he said he had some, let me quote him, 'sweet freakin' news' for us
Jason: Oh my, I can't wait to hear what the dude thought of this time, he's always full of crazy plans. I can use some excitement
So Jason heads out, starts his brand new Dodge (gotta love the sponsors) and drives up to Bryce's apartment. Bryce gets in and shows his flashy new shades.
Bryce: Do you like my new sunglasses. Present from my mom. I have the sweetest mom in the world, you know?
Jason: That's so cool man, awesome!
Not much later they arrive at Rick's place. They knock on the door but then find that it's already open. They go inside and see Rick jumping on the sofa out of joy and excitement. With confused and slightly shocked looks on their faces they shout:
Jason/Bryce: Hey Rick, what in the name of Moses are you doing?
Rick: Hey guys, good you're here, I have awesome news.
*hands them an envelope*
Jason takes the envelope and opens it. There's a letter inside. It's from the Food Network. Jason shows it to Bryce. Rick is invited to the "Iron Chef: Grilling Special" and he can bring his own team of chefs.
Rick is completely overjoyed that his mad grilling skillz are finally recognized. And he says:
Rick: You guys gotta be my chefs. Ben already said he would help me figure out some crazy Australian recipies. Koala steak and Kangaroo filet. He even thought of Dingo satés (doesn't that sound cool). And of course I gotta make my Li'l Red Burgers.
Bryce: Wow Ricky Drumsticky, that's an honor. And I'm sure you're gonna win.. I can make some sweet Canadian side salads, how about that?
Rick: Maaaaaaaaaaaaaan, that would be wicked, gimme some of that Canadian stuff dude
*high fives Bryce*
Rick: Hey Jason, how are your stirring skills
Jason looks at Rick with his typical confused look like 'I have no idea what you just said but I'll nod'
Jason: Umm, good I guess
Rick: Okay, that's settled then, you can be the sauce master!
Jason: Umm, alright?
Bryce: When is this Iron Chef thing, Rick?
Rick: It's in 2 weeks, on a sunday, we gotta be there around 3pm
Jason: So that's 2 days before we leave for North Dakota, right?
Rick: Yeah, that's right, what the heck are we doing in ND though?
Bryce: I think that skinny dude from Geffen said it had to do with publicity. We would be the first real band to do a gig in ND in almost 220 years. Even though the venue will probably filled with those crazy girls from the Midwest. And with crazy I mean cool, even though I don't get how they are able to drive to every show we play within 10,000 miles of their hometown.
Jason: Oh that's easy, I just slip them gas money everytime I see them, that way I'm sure that at least some people will show up for our gigs
Rick: But guys, don't get offtopic, we need to train for the Iron Chef
Lets do some mad cooking every wednesday, friday and sunday, starting today.
Bryce/Jason: Okay, just tell us what to do
Rick leads them to the kitchen, where he already opened the windows and set up the grill.
Rick: Okay, here you go Bryce, this was my grandma's apron, so be careful with it.
Bryce: Thanks Rick, I dig the daffodills, they remind me of Good ol' Canada
Rick: And Jason, you can use this one, it has David Hasselhoff on it. I thought you'd enjoy that.
Jason: Gee, thanks Rick, I've always wanted to be covered in The Hoff
*Jason reluctantly puts on his apron and Bryce is trying not to laugh*
Bryce: Don't you look handsome, man.
Rick: Who? Jason or David Hasselhoff?
Bryce: Well, you know I have a secret crush on David
Jason: Oh, then we should trade aprons
Bryce: No way, I'd be too distracted to actually be able to cook
*Rick puts on his apron with Ferrari print*
Rick: Okay guys, ready for some mad grilling.
Jason: Yeah, do your magic thing, Ricky
So Rick gets all the stuff out of the fridge and the cabinets and spreads it out on the counter. Then he gets the kitchen timer and sets it for 1 hour.
Rick: Ready, set, go!
Rick fires up the grill and start making some perfectly fine burgers and steaks, while Bryce is cutting like a Samurai
Bryce: Look guys, I can cut veggies with two hands simultaneously
Jason: Sweet mother of Bob, nice work Bryzo
Meanwhile, Jason is mixing and stirring and making some smooth sauces.
Jason: Hey Rick, what kind of sauce do you want with your sausages
Rick: Gimme some of that yellow stuff
Bryce: Eww
Rick: No, the other yellow stuff, you silly Canadian.
Jason: Okay, yellow stuff coming up.
Jason starts to mix some powders and fluids together and comes up with this deliciously smelling curry sauce. It's creamy and full of flavor. It smells so good even the writer here gets hungry. But that's a whole different story.
Rick: 10 minutes left guys, hurry up.
Bryce: Almost done, Chef Rick
Jason: Me too!
The kitchen timer starts buzzing and the guys stop working. Then Rick walks to the phone and dials a #
Rick: Hey Ben, what's up?
Ben: Not much mate, I'm watching me some good old Crocodile Dundee
Rick: Kick ass. But we need you man, can you come over now?
Ben: Alright bro, I'm on my way.
Rick hangs up the phone and gets back into the kitchen.
Rick: Okay, guys, we gotta set the table for Ben, he's gonna be judging.
So Bryce puts down 4 plates and nicely puts the salads on the side and decorates with some cool veggie stuff. Jason adds some dressing and sauce.
Then Rick puts a nice variety of meats on the different plates and Jason finishes it off with just the right amount of sauce. Sausages with curry sauce, steaks with pepper sauce, satés with saté sauce, and chicken breasts with hollandaise sauce.
Then the doorbell rings, so Rick goes to answer the door.
Rick: Hey mate, you're just in time
Ben: For what
Rick: Dinner
Ben: at 2pm, that's kinda early man
Rick: Don't worry, you'll love it
They walk to the kitchen, and when Ben sees all the food he actually gets hungry.
So Rick hands him the first plate and says
Rick: Our first dish is a deliciously grilled chicken breast with original French hollandaise sauce. Decorated with fresh Canadian fruit salad and Boston lettuce.
Ben: Hey, I get it, you want me to judge it so you can practice for your Iron Chef show
Rick: Indeed my good man, indeed
*Ben starts eating*
Ben: Mate, this stuff is heavenly, what's next
Bryce: Next is a supreme Chateaubriand steak with pepper sauce, all according to original French recipy. On the side you'll find a delicious Japanese salad mixed with exotic fruits as mango and pineapple. Enjoy
Rick: Bryce had to present that one, since he's the only one who can pronounce that weird French name.. I could handle the hollandaise sauce, but this got kind of tricky
Ben: I don't care what it's called, it tastes great
*Ben takes another bite*
Ben: Man, this stuff is good, I should come over for dinner every day.
Jason: There's more to come, so you'll have no hunger for the rest of the month
Bryce: Don't be so sure about that, I think that man could eat a horse when he's hungry
Jason: Well, lets serve him the next dish
Jason: We now serve you a traditional Indonesian recipy. The pork satés are nicely grilled and flavored with several spices. The creamy sauce is mildly flavored and completes the full and rich flavor of this dish. There's a rich Australian kiwi salad on the side, but I'm sure you already recognized that.
Ben: Yeah, I did, it's my favorite. Damn, you guys are mighty fine cooks, my friends
Bryce: You're gonna win this thing Rick, big time
Rick: As long as I have you guys with me, we can take the world. One burger at the time.
Rick: Okay my Australian friend, are you ready for your next dish?
Ben: Bring it on!
Rick: Okay, we bring you Italian sausages with a mild curry sauce. On the side, you'll find a Dutch broccoli salad with raisins.
Ben: I love how this thing looks, it's like artwork
Rick: Thanks mate
*Ben starts eating and then smiles*
Ben: Man, can you make me another plate of that stuff, it's tasty, crikey. I haven't eaten this good in years.
Bryce: We have one more special dish for you, to top it off
Jason: Something you really cannot resist, trust me
Rick: Okay, here it comes.
This next dish is a typical American recipy. On the outside we have a nice roasted bun, and on the inside you'll find lettuce, tomato, pickles & onion, and in the heart of the dish you'll find the best grilled burgers in the country, with a drop of ketchup.
Ben: A LIL RED BURGER!!! My day is complete.
Bryce: Look at that happy Aussie
*Jason looks up with dreamy eyes and says*
Jason: Fooooooood, mmm
Bryce: Dude, wake up, we gotta hear what Carey has to say
with a full mouth: Ben: Thwis is dwillicwous, do ya whave moor?
Rick: More, how can you eat even more???!!!
Bryce: I told you guys, he could eat a horse
Ben: I don't particularly like horses, but these burgers, man, it doesn't get any better!
.... Two weeks pass, while the guys keep practicing their cooking skills....
This is Iron Chef America: The Grilling Special ..
On tonight's episode, it is challenger Rick Woolstenhulme and his team who will try to outcook our Chef Morimoto
An hour long the guys are cooking like crazy, and Ben is tasting little pieces to see if things are perfect as can be. Then the time is up, and they just finished everything.
Time to face the jury.
Rick presents the first dish, the chicken breasts
Judge 1: I love how tender the chicken is. It's like laying on a waterbed, but then food
Rick looks confused but says
Rick: Thank you
Judge 2: Great presentation, I like how the chicken depicts a face with the sauce as eyes, ears, nose & mouth and the salad as hair. Very creative
Rick thinks: did we really do that, or is this guy just totally flipping?
Rick: Thanks, I'm glad you like it
Judge 3: I really enjoy the texture, it's exactly how I like my breasts
Rick: Sweet, thanks
Then he presents the next dish, the steak
Judge 1: Great taste. And very good use of different influences.
Rick: Yeah, I picked up the salad when I learned a silly Japanese song
Judge 1: Banzai
Rick: Actually, yeah "banzai kimini ai iyogata uno amazuto zuto ashuno mana happy"
Rick & the Judge laugh together
Judge 2: Nice presentation, what is it representing
Rick: The steak is the big drum, and the salads on both sides represent the cymbals and the sauce represents the framework
Judge 2: Ooh wow *and shakes his head*
Judge 3: Steakalicious
Rick: Thanks man
The saté is next
Judge 1: It's a bit spicy, but it tastes pretty good
Rick: Thank you
Judge 2: This is THE best presentation I have ever seen, it's like the satés are knitting a sweater out of the salad. That's ace.
*Rick nods and says* Rick: Thanks for the compliment, I thought it was pretty clever myself, if I may say so
Judge 3: Don't mind me, I gotta finish this plate
*Rick laughs*
While Judge 3 is finishing his plate, the next dish is brought in. (The sausages)
Judge 1: I love this sauce, it complements the sausages perfectly. And the salad is great. The raisins are a great addition.
Rick: Thanks, glad you like it
Judge 2: I have to agree with that. I also like how it looks like a forest.
Rick: Pretty cool, huh?
Judge 3: Holy cow!
Rick: Actually no, it's heavenly pig, but I hear they have holy cows in India
Then the special last dish is served
Judge 1: Sweet heavens, this definitely beats McDonalds
Judge 2: Well, pretty much anything does
Judge 1: Take a bite and judge for yourself
Rick: These are my specialty, the LIL RED 'GRILLED BURGERS'
Judge 3: You can say that again, can I get another special of the day?
After all the judging, it is now time for the final results. Did Rick win this episode of Iron Chef?
Host of the show: And with 55 points vs. 48, Rick Woolstenhulme wins this Iron Chef America. (and in the background a parody of "You And Me" starts playing ... "cause it's pork and beef, and all kinds of salads, with sauce on the top, grilled to perfection, it's pork and beef, and all kinds of salads, I'm eating it now, delicious and perfect it is")
...........
.........
.......
.....
...
..
.
Then Rick suddenly wakes up and finds Jason shaking his shoulder.
Jason: Hey Rick, get up, we gotta do a soundcheck in 10 minutes.
Rick: Man, you'll never believe what I just dreamed about
Jason: Your victory at Iron Chef?
Rick: What the... how did you know?
Jason: You talk in your sleep man, we recorded the whole thing. Ben suggested to use it as a bonus track for the new single
Rick: You wouldn't?!?!
Jason: Well, get up man, soundcheck in a bit.
Rick: Alright, I'll be there
It's a rainy sunday morning and Jason just got out of the shower and is looking on his schedule to see what he has to do today.
Jason: Hmm, apparently today I have nothing to do. That's mighty boring, you know? I should go to Ricky today.
He grabs his coat on the way out and calls Bryce
Jason: Yo B! wanna go hang at Rick's?
Bryce: Yeah, we should go see drummer boy, when I was talking to him online last night he said he had some, let me quote him, 'sweet freakin' news' for us
Jason: Oh my, I can't wait to hear what the dude thought of this time, he's always full of crazy plans. I can use some excitement
So Jason heads out, starts his brand new Dodge (gotta love the sponsors) and drives up to Bryce's apartment. Bryce gets in and shows his flashy new shades.
Bryce: Do you like my new sunglasses. Present from my mom. I have the sweetest mom in the world, you know?
Jason: That's so cool man, awesome!
Not much later they arrive at Rick's place. They knock on the door but then find that it's already open. They go inside and see Rick jumping on the sofa out of joy and excitement. With confused and slightly shocked looks on their faces they shout:
Jason/Bryce: Hey Rick, what in the name of Moses are you doing?
Rick: Hey guys, good you're here, I have awesome news.
*hands them an envelope*
Jason takes the envelope and opens it. There's a letter inside. It's from the Food Network. Jason shows it to Bryce. Rick is invited to the "Iron Chef: Grilling Special" and he can bring his own team of chefs.
Rick is completely overjoyed that his mad grilling skillz are finally recognized. And he says:
Rick: You guys gotta be my chefs. Ben already said he would help me figure out some crazy Australian recipies. Koala steak and Kangaroo filet. He even thought of Dingo satés (doesn't that sound cool). And of course I gotta make my Li'l Red Burgers.
Bryce: Wow Ricky Drumsticky, that's an honor. And I'm sure you're gonna win.. I can make some sweet Canadian side salads, how about that?
Rick: Maaaaaaaaaaaaaan, that would be wicked, gimme some of that Canadian stuff dude
*high fives Bryce*
Rick: Hey Jason, how are your stirring skills
Jason looks at Rick with his typical confused look like 'I have no idea what you just said but I'll nod'
Jason: Umm, good I guess
Rick: Okay, that's settled then, you can be the sauce master!
Jason: Umm, alright?
Bryce: When is this Iron Chef thing, Rick?
Rick: It's in 2 weeks, on a sunday, we gotta be there around 3pm
Jason: So that's 2 days before we leave for North Dakota, right?
Rick: Yeah, that's right, what the heck are we doing in ND though?
Bryce: I think that skinny dude from Geffen said it had to do with publicity. We would be the first real band to do a gig in ND in almost 220 years. Even though the venue will probably filled with those crazy girls from the Midwest. And with crazy I mean cool, even though I don't get how they are able to drive to every show we play within 10,000 miles of their hometown.
Jason: Oh that's easy, I just slip them gas money everytime I see them, that way I'm sure that at least some people will show up for our gigs
Rick: But guys, don't get offtopic, we need to train for the Iron Chef
Lets do some mad cooking every wednesday, friday and sunday, starting today.
Bryce/Jason: Okay, just tell us what to do
Rick leads them to the kitchen, where he already opened the windows and set up the grill.
Rick: Okay, here you go Bryce, this was my grandma's apron, so be careful with it.
Bryce: Thanks Rick, I dig the daffodills, they remind me of Good ol' Canada
Rick: And Jason, you can use this one, it has David Hasselhoff on it. I thought you'd enjoy that.
Jason: Gee, thanks Rick, I've always wanted to be covered in The Hoff
*Jason reluctantly puts on his apron and Bryce is trying not to laugh*
Bryce: Don't you look handsome, man.
Rick: Who? Jason or David Hasselhoff?
Bryce: Well, you know I have a secret crush on David
Jason: Oh, then we should trade aprons
Bryce: No way, I'd be too distracted to actually be able to cook
*Rick puts on his apron with Ferrari print*
Rick: Okay guys, ready for some mad grilling.
Jason: Yeah, do your magic thing, Ricky
So Rick gets all the stuff out of the fridge and the cabinets and spreads it out on the counter. Then he gets the kitchen timer and sets it for 1 hour.
Rick: Ready, set, go!
Rick fires up the grill and start making some perfectly fine burgers and steaks, while Bryce is cutting like a Samurai
Bryce: Look guys, I can cut veggies with two hands simultaneously
Jason: Sweet mother of Bob, nice work Bryzo
Meanwhile, Jason is mixing and stirring and making some smooth sauces.
Jason: Hey Rick, what kind of sauce do you want with your sausages
Rick: Gimme some of that yellow stuff
Bryce: Eww
Rick: No, the other yellow stuff, you silly Canadian.
Jason: Okay, yellow stuff coming up.
Jason starts to mix some powders and fluids together and comes up with this deliciously smelling curry sauce. It's creamy and full of flavor. It smells so good even the writer here gets hungry. But that's a whole different story.
Rick: 10 minutes left guys, hurry up.
Bryce: Almost done, Chef Rick
Jason: Me too!
The kitchen timer starts buzzing and the guys stop working. Then Rick walks to the phone and dials a #
Rick: Hey Ben, what's up?
Ben: Not much mate, I'm watching me some good old Crocodile Dundee
Rick: Kick ass. But we need you man, can you come over now?
Ben: Alright bro, I'm on my way.
Rick hangs up the phone and gets back into the kitchen.
Rick: Okay, guys, we gotta set the table for Ben, he's gonna be judging.
So Bryce puts down 4 plates and nicely puts the salads on the side and decorates with some cool veggie stuff. Jason adds some dressing and sauce.
Then Rick puts a nice variety of meats on the different plates and Jason finishes it off with just the right amount of sauce. Sausages with curry sauce, steaks with pepper sauce, satés with saté sauce, and chicken breasts with hollandaise sauce.
Then the doorbell rings, so Rick goes to answer the door.
Rick: Hey mate, you're just in time
Ben: For what
Rick: Dinner
Ben: at 2pm, that's kinda early man
Rick: Don't worry, you'll love it
They walk to the kitchen, and when Ben sees all the food he actually gets hungry.
So Rick hands him the first plate and says
Rick: Our first dish is a deliciously grilled chicken breast with original French hollandaise sauce. Decorated with fresh Canadian fruit salad and Boston lettuce.
Ben: Hey, I get it, you want me to judge it so you can practice for your Iron Chef show
Rick: Indeed my good man, indeed
*Ben starts eating*
Ben: Mate, this stuff is heavenly, what's next
Bryce: Next is a supreme Chateaubriand steak with pepper sauce, all according to original French recipy. On the side you'll find a delicious Japanese salad mixed with exotic fruits as mango and pineapple. Enjoy
Rick: Bryce had to present that one, since he's the only one who can pronounce that weird French name.. I could handle the hollandaise sauce, but this got kind of tricky
Ben: I don't care what it's called, it tastes great
*Ben takes another bite*
Ben: Man, this stuff is good, I should come over for dinner every day.
Jason: There's more to come, so you'll have no hunger for the rest of the month
Bryce: Don't be so sure about that, I think that man could eat a horse when he's hungry
Jason: Well, lets serve him the next dish
Jason: We now serve you a traditional Indonesian recipy. The pork satés are nicely grilled and flavored with several spices. The creamy sauce is mildly flavored and completes the full and rich flavor of this dish. There's a rich Australian kiwi salad on the side, but I'm sure you already recognized that.
Ben: Yeah, I did, it's my favorite. Damn, you guys are mighty fine cooks, my friends
Bryce: You're gonna win this thing Rick, big time
Rick: As long as I have you guys with me, we can take the world. One burger at the time.
Rick: Okay my Australian friend, are you ready for your next dish?
Ben: Bring it on!
Rick: Okay, we bring you Italian sausages with a mild curry sauce. On the side, you'll find a Dutch broccoli salad with raisins.
Ben: I love how this thing looks, it's like artwork
Rick: Thanks mate
*Ben starts eating and then smiles*
Ben: Man, can you make me another plate of that stuff, it's tasty, crikey. I haven't eaten this good in years.
Bryce: We have one more special dish for you, to top it off
Jason: Something you really cannot resist, trust me
Rick: Okay, here it comes.
This next dish is a typical American recipy. On the outside we have a nice roasted bun, and on the inside you'll find lettuce, tomato, pickles & onion, and in the heart of the dish you'll find the best grilled burgers in the country, with a drop of ketchup.
Ben: A LIL RED BURGER!!! My day is complete.
Bryce: Look at that happy Aussie
*Jason looks up with dreamy eyes and says*
Jason: Fooooooood, mmm
Bryce: Dude, wake up, we gotta hear what Carey has to say
with a full mouth: Ben: Thwis is dwillicwous, do ya whave moor?
Rick: More, how can you eat even more???!!!
Bryce: I told you guys, he could eat a horse
Ben: I don't particularly like horses, but these burgers, man, it doesn't get any better!
.... Two weeks pass, while the guys keep practicing their cooking skills....
This is Iron Chef America: The Grilling Special ..
On tonight's episode, it is challenger Rick Woolstenhulme and his team who will try to outcook our Chef Morimoto
An hour long the guys are cooking like crazy, and Ben is tasting little pieces to see if things are perfect as can be. Then the time is up, and they just finished everything.
Time to face the jury.
Rick presents the first dish, the chicken breasts
Judge 1: I love how tender the chicken is. It's like laying on a waterbed, but then food
Rick looks confused but says
Rick: Thank you
Judge 2: Great presentation, I like how the chicken depicts a face with the sauce as eyes, ears, nose & mouth and the salad as hair. Very creative
Rick thinks: did we really do that, or is this guy just totally flipping?
Rick: Thanks, I'm glad you like it
Judge 3: I really enjoy the texture, it's exactly how I like my breasts
Rick: Sweet, thanks
Then he presents the next dish, the steak
Judge 1: Great taste. And very good use of different influences.
Rick: Yeah, I picked up the salad when I learned a silly Japanese song
Judge 1: Banzai
Rick: Actually, yeah "banzai kimini ai iyogata uno amazuto zuto ashuno mana happy"
Rick & the Judge laugh together
Judge 2: Nice presentation, what is it representing
Rick: The steak is the big drum, and the salads on both sides represent the cymbals and the sauce represents the framework
Judge 2: Ooh wow *and shakes his head*
Judge 3: Steakalicious
Rick: Thanks man
The saté is next
Judge 1: It's a bit spicy, but it tastes pretty good
Rick: Thank you
Judge 2: This is THE best presentation I have ever seen, it's like the satés are knitting a sweater out of the salad. That's ace.
*Rick nods and says* Rick: Thanks for the compliment, I thought it was pretty clever myself, if I may say so
Judge 3: Don't mind me, I gotta finish this plate
*Rick laughs*
While Judge 3 is finishing his plate, the next dish is brought in. (The sausages)
Judge 1: I love this sauce, it complements the sausages perfectly. And the salad is great. The raisins are a great addition.
Rick: Thanks, glad you like it
Judge 2: I have to agree with that. I also like how it looks like a forest.
Rick: Pretty cool, huh?
Judge 3: Holy cow!
Rick: Actually no, it's heavenly pig, but I hear they have holy cows in India
Then the special last dish is served
Judge 1: Sweet heavens, this definitely beats McDonalds
Judge 2: Well, pretty much anything does
Judge 1: Take a bite and judge for yourself
Rick: These are my specialty, the LIL RED 'GRILLED BURGERS'
Judge 3: You can say that again, can I get another special of the day?
After all the judging, it is now time for the final results. Did Rick win this episode of Iron Chef?
Host of the show: And with 55 points vs. 48, Rick Woolstenhulme wins this Iron Chef America. (and in the background a parody of "You And Me" starts playing ... "cause it's pork and beef, and all kinds of salads, with sauce on the top, grilled to perfection, it's pork and beef, and all kinds of salads, I'm eating it now, delicious and perfect it is")
...........
.........
.......
.....
...
..
.
Then Rick suddenly wakes up and finds Jason shaking his shoulder.
Jason: Hey Rick, get up, we gotta do a soundcheck in 10 minutes.
Rick: Man, you'll never believe what I just dreamed about
Jason: Your victory at Iron Chef?
Rick: What the... how did you know?
Jason: You talk in your sleep man, we recorded the whole thing. Ben suggested to use it as a bonus track for the new single
Rick: You wouldn't?!?!
Jason: Well, get up man, soundcheck in a bit.
Rick: Alright, I'll be there